


A Sort of Kindness

by turtlebook



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-03
Updated: 2014-10-03
Packaged: 2018-02-19 18:04:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2397749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/turtlebook/pseuds/turtlebook
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She was young, that was the problem.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Sort of Kindness

"So, Doctor, you were saying?"

He opened an eye and looked at her. River was draped over his chest, her chin planted on the back of her hand, and she was staring at him.

He closed the eye. "Can't you see I'm busy? Don't ask silly questions. Or any questions, but definitely not silly ones." That bought him a minute or two of silence. He smoothed a calming hand up and down her back. 

He heard her sigh, and she started drawing idly on his chest with the tip of her finger. 

Or not so idly: 

_I'm bored_ , it said, in lazy, swirling Gallifreyan. 

This time, just for variety, he opened the other eye.

"Sorry, are you trying to sleep?" she asked innocently, as the scrawling on his skin, conversely, became very rude indeed.

She was young, that was the problem. 

River Song later in her timeline quite liked a cuddle - though you wouldn't catch her admitting it. This River hadn't been in prison long enough to develop the ability to sit still for more than two minutes at a stretch, let alone an appreciation for the quiet moments of intimacy he occasionally liked to share with his wife. That was all still to come, for her; he tried not to begrudge her it. Till then:

"All right, what was I saying?" He smiled up at her as her eyes lifted from his sternum to meet his gaze. "Well? I hope you know, because I haven't the foggiest."

Her lips twitched as she tried to hide an answering smile. "Oh, I don't know, something like, 'no, River, not this time, I've got a lovely trip planned and you're always trying to distract me like this but it's not going to work this time I'm determined -' and then you had your face down the front of my top so I didn't catch the rest."

"You _are_ always trying to distract me."

"Trying, you say."

"But I - oh!" He surged up, toppling her off him as he remembered: "The thing! Plans! Yes, _that's_ what I was saying before you went and got all..." He trailed off with a gesture.

"Distracting."

"Very, yes." He bounced the mattress beneath them and leaned over to press a noisy kiss against her cheek. He stayed there propped on his side, looking fondly down at her, so glad that, this young, he still had half a shot at impressing her. She snorted and pushed past him to sit up. "I've got big plans for today, River, really, you're gonna love it. Whatever did you go and distract me like that for, anyway? Got much better things to do today that lay around in bed."

"Heaven only knows," she said as she sat, stretching her arms over her head, curls falling down her gracefully arching back. 

His eyes travelled up the line of her body, from bare hip to bare - everything else - and found himself getting very distracted all over again. "No, stop that," he said. "We've got big plans, to go and do a - a thing - big, amazing, very cool, very big thing, and we're going now, so stop it."

"Are you talking to me, or the very big thing?" She drawled that last part suggestively. 

He had no idea to what she was so suggestively referring. "You stop it, too, or you can jolly well stay right here," he told her firmly.

"What, with a whole TARDIS all to myself? Promises, promises, Doctor." She turned and laughed at the look on his face. "So where are we going and what are we doing?"

"It's a surprise and Beta Delphini."

"Beta Delphini? Sounds fun."

"Heard of it?"

"Mm, don't think so. Come on, you're not going to tell me anything? Whatever shall I wear?" She hopped off the bed and crossed to the wardrobe, stopping to deftly kick her knickers up off the floor with her toes and grab them from the air before stepping into them. Then she swung the double doors open and stood, contemplating the interior. "No hints?"

"Oh!" He sat up, because fashion advice - he was great at this. "Something with, you know," he motioned enthusiastically, miming things, _round_ things, in the air. "It should be something that fits. Oh, and with buttons. Love buttons. Or maybe I just like the word: buttons. Sounds a bit cheeky, hah."

"Thank you, sweetie, that's very helpful," came her disembodied voice from several feet inside the wardrobe. Suddenly she reappeared, poking her head back around the door. She hadn't managed to find any more clothes, yet, but she was now sporting a very fetching pith helmet. "Will this do?"

He took a moment to admire the sight. 

Of the hat, of course, although the near-naked River under it was nice, too. 

He was slow, therefore, to notice the way she was pressing her lips together, all of a sudden fairly bouncing with barely repressed excitement. A _pith helmet_. 

"You know!" He pointed an accusing finger. "You know where we're going! How do you know, already? It was meant to be a surprise."

"It was a wonderful surprise, sweetie. When you told me I'd get to go exploring the lost temples of Beta Delphini with you soon. I think you'd just come from there. Spoilers, I know, I know, but you definitely mentioned something about lost temples and a hidden tomb and oh, Doctor, let it never be said you don't know how to show a girl a good time. I absolutely lo-"

"Love a tomb, yes, I know," he said, beginning to scowl. "But why the hell did I _spoil_ it? It was supposed to be a surprise and now it's ruined."

"I don't know. Oh, stop pouting and get dressed. If I get to the control room before you I'll take us there myself. What time period were you thinking?" She paused a moment to adjust the pith helmet a little using the mirror inside the wardrobe door. "Sweetie?"

He crossed his arms over his chest and continued to sit, unmoving, glowering. "Don't you already know?" 

She stopped admiring herself and looked over. "You're still pouting. I didn't spoil myself, you know."

"You did, though! Just now, by _telling_ me I told you. Now I have to tell you about Delphini next time I see you. Spoilers, River! Honestly, I thought we covered this." Increasingly annoyed, at his future self as well as her, he jumped off his side of the bed, grabbing for his trousers and pulling them back on.

"Don't turn it round on me. You never _told_ me not to say I knew about your plans today. And you'd already done today, so who's to blame, really?"

"I couldn't tell you not to tell me, because I knew you did tell me. Try to keep up, dear."

Hands planted now on her hips, she looked like she was restraining herself from coming over and thumping him. Wouldn't have been the first time. Well, probably would be for her - nice that they still had these firsts coming.

But she didn't move except to drop her arms and turn back to the closet, starting to flip rapidly through the clothes hanging within reach. 

"You have a choice, sweetie," she said airily. "Right? I mean, that's what you're always telling me, at least; that I have a choice. That nothing's written in stone. Go ahead, keep your big mouth shut next time you see me. This won't have happened, and maybe I'll be out there enjoying my tomb right now instead of standing here having a row with you in my knickers. Fun as this is."

"I'm sorry, is that really how you think this works? It - that's - ooh, what do you think spoilers are for? Once I know something has happened, that means it has to happen."

"Why not?" she shot back over her shoulder, picking out a shirt only to thrown it down again. "I mean, it's hardly a fixed point, is it, Time Lord? You can do what you like, come and go just as you please, time is your playground - I've heard that speech already, no need to repeat it."

Well, now she was just aiming to rile him up rather than back down herself. No matter how old, she hated being in the wrong. Of course, the further in her timeline she was, the less that happened. 

He never really appreciated what a gift it was, his River who always knew, until he had her standing in front of him needing him to _explain_. 

She was too young and she needed him and he shouldn't have resented that but he did, suddenly. More than a bit.

"That's not what we do, never, not _ever_ , River," he threw at her, pulling at his hair as he paced behind her. "We do not change _us_. That's the whole point. I mean, really, did you learn nothing at Lake Silencio?"

She flinched and her movements stilled, clearly stung, and his frustration ran away from him just as surely as their nice day out had already done.

He sighed as he watched her take the helmet off and put it away from her before grabbing some clothes and getting dressed with quick, efficient movements.

The problem, he reflected, wasn't that she was young. It was that she didn't see it, how this would go.

He saw it all: he would leave this River behind, a River who was perhaps a touch disillusioned but also a little wiser for it; he would go and find her younger self, drop a hint or two and watch her face light up and send her on her way, unaware, to come here and ruin his own surprise and be scolded for her troubles. Send her off to a Doctor who never managed to deserve her until it was too late to count.

The problem was she didn't see, yet, how cruel it could be, loving him.

It was his task now to teach her, little by little.

He went to her and stopped her, her hands fumbling with the zipper fastening of a jacket as she tried to get it off the hanger. He took her hands, pulling her over to sit next to him on the side of the bed. She wouldn't look at him, didn't till he put her diary in her hands, and then it was only a quick glance before her eyes dropped again.

"This is why," he said, his hands still covering hers over the diary. "Because it's us, River, however it happens, has happened, will happen. I'll never change a thing, I promise you. Every word, every line, is precious."

The diary was still slim and new-looking, the pages not crumpled with years of turning, the cover unmarked by being battered about the universe from one end of time to the other. Her thumb stroked over the leather as she stared down at their hands and the book in her lap.

"Go ahead, today's entry: write down how we shouted at each other, a pair of half-naked idiots who should probably know better."

"Speak for yourself," she murmured.

"And then how we made up, and put on some really cool headwear and went and had a lovely afternoon together exploring a dusty old tomb."

A hint of a smile appeared as she leaned into his side. "So I keep hearing. But that last bit hasn't happened yet."

He turned his face down and kissed her shoulder. "Spoilers."


End file.
